Happy Mother's Day!

Mother's Day is an interesting holiday. I think most of the country believes it is a day to honor mothers, and to show them how much they are appreciated. It is also a day that many myths of motherhood are perpetuated, even by fellow mothers.

Allow me to explain. I am speaking, of course, from the perspective of a young mother with three small children. Motherhood for me is different from the motherhood of, say, the 65 year old woman from church. Speaking of church, we had a lovely mother's day service today, complete with Bible readings on the topic of motherhood/womanhood (Prov. 31) and specially selected hymns for the occassion. My personal favorite was "Love at Home." Now, I have never really been a fan of this song (ask Filipe), but today, it really struck me as somewhat ironic. The lyrics are so sweet and serene:

There is beauty all around,
When there's love at home;
There is joy in every sound,
When there's love at home.
Peace and plenty here abide
Smiling fair on every side;
Time doth softly, sweetly glide
When there's love at home.

I get such an uplifting mental picture when I focus on the words. Then I look over in my pew at my three rapscallions: Sofia's pouring fruity cheerios into her hand, but managing to get most of them on the pew or the floor, Sam is trying to grab another kid's truck that has struck his fancy, but the other kid didn't think it was a good time to share (sorry, Brady!), and Ben, dear Ben, is throwing a tantrum on the seat because I won't let him run down the aisles. None of my children are joyful in the sounds they are making, and I'm not feeling particularly peaceful, either. And since I'm counting the minutes until we can leave, time doth not sweetly glide for us.

My point, here, ladies and gentlemen, is that Motherhood is idealized, especially from a religious perspective. The Everyman Mother, on the other hand, experiences something quite different. At this point in my life, rather than have a lovely little poem read for me, I would love it if the earliteen Sabbath School would sponsor a morning of child care for the mothers, so for once we could actually listen to a sermon, instead of playing referee between our kids (and sometimes the kids next to us!). Instead of focusing on the image of a glowing, perpetually cheerful, nurturing mother, please acknowledge that this job includes a lot of impatient, even angry times, and that it's okay if we don't live up to the honestly beautiful idea portrayed in Proverbs 31. I would like some affirmation that even if I don't enjoy being a mother all the time (gasp! did I just type that!) it's okay, it doesn't make me a bad person, or a bad mother.

Being a mother of three little children is a contact sport, it's an active occupation, it's depressing, frustrating, annoying.... But I wouldn't choose to do anything else. I love those children more than life itself. And I talk bad about my kids sometimes, but just like a mama bear, if anyone else suggests a threat, I will maul them. Okay, that sounded a little more graphic than I planned. But I still mean it. My children are the brightest, sweetest, most loving children I have ever met. They just drive me crazy sometimes. And that's okay, because even if that line didn't make it into the final editing of "Love at Home," it doesn't make it any less true.

"There is laundry all around,
but there's love at home;
There are many screeching sounds,
but there's love at home.
Toys and puzzles here abide,
games and dolls on every side;
Lack of sleep make-up hides,
But there's love at home!"